Tell me about it

I think the poster is all figured out now, I just need to see about the talk. I really don't think they want to see me go up with a big old stack of papers. One is bad enough. I'll have to wait and see. I probably won't flunk if I mess up. Hmm, what is there to write about? Um, Apparently nothing. I could ruin the rest of all of your days and stop now, but that would be so selfish of me. Instead, I'm going to tell you a story about a woodpecker- THAT'S IT! I just remembered, yesterday we had a service project and helped someone move some stuff out of a storage unit. Okay... Back to the woodpecker.

Once upon a time, there lived a small woodpecker in a bright forest glade. As always, he went about finding food, pecking into the trees for the bugs which lay just inside. This day, however, was not as fortunate as others, for the bark seemed harder than usual. Indeed, the woodpecker went on and after a few moments was stuck on the tree. Was this the worst of his problems? No. The bright forest glade also had the eyes of others. But for them, it was lumber. The woodpecker heard the trunk of the tree cut slowly away and soon the tree was falling with him as well. Fortunately he was on the side that landed upright, but unfortunately the tree was soon loaded up and on its way back to the city to be processed in the sawmill. By the time the woodpecker freed its beak from the bark, he was already in the city. This, oddly enough did not seem to concern the woodpecker. It still had trees, a bit strange looking trees, but trees. He flew up to once of the skyscrapers and started pecking. Sadly, these "trees" did not have any bugs to eat and the woodpecker died. The End.

The moral of the story: Don't be a woodpecker.

Maybe a little too much...

Both presentations so far have been a brief summary of their life in a timeline kind of thing, so I'm wondering if I may have done a little too much... Seven pages is a kind of a little more than I would think anyone would like to hear... I don't know, I think I have an idea off what to put in the empty space of my poster though. People have been putting pictures of the temples the prophet dedicated, so that should work okay. I'll probably make a little caption for them. I'm confused. How much am I supposed to say?!? I'm going to work on it a bit today and see what happens. I figured out though that the project isn't due until next week, so that should give me a little time to work with. Bye everybody!

Crunch time... postponed?

Yes, mother, I know your busy. And for the love of Pete, how many times do I have to tell you??? I love you and your comments. Okay, mom? Really now, everybody, haven't I told her that already? Good mom. Good person. END of story. No more of this saying you aren't loved, that's my stick. Although, I must say, if you just said you wanted the computer, you could just say so and I'll guaranty you that we'll get off within a few minutes. If not... Well, I'll just have a little chat with them. *evil grin* But yes, mother is good. Everyone knows it. There's a post on my old blog about. Everything is settled.

And David and/or Teresa, that comment was both reassuring and more than a little scary. I LOVE IT! By the way, thanks about Project WW. (PS: WW does not stand for World War, as is explained in an earlier post)

So yes, as for the title, I just learned in Seminary that my project is not due tomorrow, when it is, I don't know, but I have today and tomorrow at least to work on it and I'm pretty sure it's either Thursday or Friday. That settled, I take my leave.

PS again: I started writing in a journal again a few days ago, not that this wouldn't count as a journal, right? I believe this one will be for more personal use. (just in case you want to read it, mom, fine, but tell me first okay? I've seen some unfortunate comedies about when that happens)

Yep, I have come to the conclusion that I'm all alone, now.

Well, I forgot to mention this before, but a small note on the WW project is that we aren't supposed to use the internet. Not even LDS.Org. So yeah, I'm glad most of what I have is from Teachings of the Presidents of the Church: Wilford Woodruff. Nice book, too. It's got this great picture I'd like for my poster, but it's a bit small, so I'll see if I can get it onto the computer and mess with the size a bit. Um... There's not much more happening than that. Today is the last day of school for Andrew and I, and I am very glad for it. Gives me more time to work on WW. Also, Travis came yesterday, and that's always fun. Fun. Such a slack word. It could mean anything really... Anywho, yeah, life is nice. No one died. I think. I got to go now, there is work to do and the day is dwindling fast. *waves frantically*

Yeah, okay. This is a little boring.

NO LIFE! Okay, what can I take from my plain life and stick on this happy little blog... Um, I just got my poster board for my presentation. Due Wednesday. Are we worried? Nah, never would we be worried. We skip that. Now, we are officially TERRIFIED. I am NOT a public speaker. Oh well, fifteen minutes of terror should pass quickly, right? And o' course it doesn't help that I'm the youngest one in the class... Oh, good gravy, I'm a goner... Farewell friends, come Wednesday, I may never see you again. *faints* And I have a a good picture for the poster, but it's... a little small...

Oh well, I'm going now. Goodbye!

Oh yes, happy yester-birthday Andrew!

First thing that we do is, of course, SING! The Never-Ending Song of the Elephant! Too bad Anna hit the TV table's leg and maybe a gong-like sound. I could have gone on for hours. Just imagine, hours of following someone around and singing repetitively all day... It'd get very boring. Oh well. Anywho, good stuff, eh. Um... Andrew is really close to Eagle and most of the pressure is off. He got his papers accepted Saturday, I believe. So yes, much happiness. Only an Eagle board left and he's done. And then it'll be my turn. Wonderful.

I think I shall stop for the day now. As I always say, better miserable and productive than happy and lazy! Our feet are sane!

Exile

I have determined that after months of work, I am alone. Now, the perfect time to reveal my plans... *static*

Any... send... young... launch... unguarded... mission....

*static clears* ... Report back at 0900.


Ah, so I am not alone. That's very interesting... *eats strawberry*


Hi everyone! Or one, depending on how many are here. I wouldn't be surprised if there aren't many left. Psychotics are only entertaining for so long. Well, I must depart. I have... business I must see to... Farewell.

Time

I believe the deadline for our prophet projects is coming up, so I should start getting more active about it. Active? Scary thought. Anyway, so yeah, that'll be fun. I'm going to be water Ruth's garden while they're out of town. (What an honor) For those who haven't seen it, it's a very nice garden. And surprisingly space-efficient! And who knew peas grew so fast... Good stuff. What else must I talk about... There's got to be more. Well, for one thing, I have to look for a good picture of Wilford Woodruff for my poster. Large and no too scary looking. He was a very intimidating figure. Although, from what I've read about him, he seems very nice. And EXTREMELY humble. So yeah, work to do and stuff to study. Goodbye everybody!

Yes, mom, my self-esteem. It's the best study movie I've ever found. Very good for schoolwork. THAT'S IT! I'LL SAY MY TRADITION IS ONLY FOR SCHOOL DAYS! SUMMER AND HOLIDAYS, I'D BE OFF THE HOOK! It's perfect. ^^ *acts very smug about saved goal* Okay, I'm happy now.

I'm pretty sure he was enjoying himself. Every now and then he'd get us back to the lesson, but then we started up again. I feel sorry for Jared, though. He misses out on a lot of very entertaining dialog. Um, seeing as my goal has been saved and the Bartsian Mecha-Mites seem to be coming along okay, I'm gonna take off for a bit. Bye everybody!

Do. Not. Put. Down. Chronicles. Of. Narnia.

It will ruin my self esteem. That movie is awesome. Maybe not as good as Curious George or Spider-man, but good no the less. I need strawberries...





I think there was a gas leak during Seminary. We were bursting out laughing half the time. First, I was talking about a joke we heard on Armstrong and Getty. Iran has found out how to refine Uranium and now there are whales swimming up the Sacramento river? They're going to blow up the white house! Then Bryce was talking about how his teacher spat while he talked whenever he got mad. Then Andrew went off on a tangent about everything being right-handed. All the while, Bishop Farimond was holding his tie above his head like a hang-man's noose, staring up at the ceiling, and making talking movements that looked suspiciously like "why?". It was funny. Anyway, I'm leaving now. Bye, everybody!

Yin Yang Swirly Thing

The art of Yin Yang in a whole new perspective. And plus, it would be impossible to do in real life. AND IT'S BLUE, SILVER, AND BLACK! Three of the best colors ever! It is the only icon I've found that I can stare at for hours at a time without getting bored. Just a little dizzy after a while...

Uh, I got out of fishing yesterday so I got to stay home, along with forging a signature, continuing my long honored tradition of watching the Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, The Witch, and The Wardrobe every weekday for the past two months! This, of course, is the two month marker point, I having starting this noble goal March 16, 2007. The only thing I'm worried about is the fact that I will be gone for a few weeks later. Acadia's baptism might be okay, but scout camp and the Disneyland trip with my cousin and two aunts (thanks very much for inviting me, by the way) will likely be the falling point for me. Maybe I'll start doing it again afterwards. It's nice to watch it while I do my school work. Anyway, I believe the time has come for me to depart. Toodles!

Fish

The scouts are going fishing with the younger kids tonight and Brother Peña didn't seem like there was a choice in the matter. I probably won't go. Andrew has a conflicting meeting (he planned it that way) and I'm not too excited anyway. A bunch of yelling kids and poor dying fish? I think I'll pass. Nice peaceful evening while I try to create something passable for a "Bio in a nutshell presentation."

I begin to run out of topics to enrich your lives with. Are we surprised? I doubt it. Alright, unless I think of something soon, this is good for now...


Nothing? Good. Bye everyone, the psycho has left the building. Correction: ONE of the psychos has left the building.

HAPPY BELATED MOTHER'S DAY!!!

Yeah, good stuff. And also, 15th post on blogger! Yep, most are utterly bored at this point, but WE KEEP GOING! I will not write long, due to the fact that, as usual, I am late, but I would just like to say: Happy Mother's Day! Yes, it is nice. Never trade a truck for a man's word that he will give you immunity. It won't work. That is all, I believe. If not, it shall wait. There was a camp out, yes it was fun. It was horrible. They put potatoes with the tri-tip, THEY KNOW I LOVE POTATOES. I had to like it. They had smores, good skits, flashlight tag, potatoes (again) with breakfast, camp activities. IT WAS HORRIBLY GOOD. *sigh* Our feet are sane. *walks off*

Camping, or mutilated camping

How can they do this?!?!? First tri-tip instead of hamburgers and hot dogs, then some "desert" instead of smores. What's next? No instant oatmeal for breakfast or PB&J for lunch!?!? The smores you live with, those aren't on most camp outs anyway. But for the father and son's outing!?! Why would you eat TRI-TIP? It's supposed to be hamburgers and hot dogs, instant oatmeal, and PB&Js. THAT is it. Camping meals that should NOT be tampered with. there probably won't even be flash light tag. I don't like it. *storms off*

*chugs strawberry flavored instant oatmeal packet* Maybe that's why you're supposed to cook it... Oh well, but giving of my villainous plots for world domination? Never. Great Britain is a nice place for intelligence surveillance, though. I've got a few guys in other areas, but really only one or two in the British region.

Where was I? Oh yes, HOW COULD THEY DO THIS?!?!? All done now. I must pack what I have forgotten. Farewell, mostly innocent bystanders. *waves frantically*

Darn it, mom! I love you, okay???

Honestly! Under the clearly fake comment backtrack. I DID NOT MEAN IT. And David, I'm not that smart. I copied and pasted, I was rushed. Just like now. That and I have no idea how to figure out what color text it was. The size, the font. It seemed a bit too much to take on.

One more thing. Coding for the Yin Yang-ish thing. I'm not entirely sure what you mean by coding, but the URL is "http://i29.photobucket.com/albums/c266/jebminan/YinYang.gif". By the way, thanks! I found it a while back. Drove my brothers mad when I spent hours staring at it. It was rather addicting at first, and entertaining.

Um, is that it? I'm not sure what the deleted comment was, but okay. I think that's all for now, I gotta run. Running late again. Always doing that, aren't I? Toodles!

Hehehe

I like to eat pie! Ahem, yes, I didn't see you come in... *hides strawberry pie* Um, if your looking for wonderful details about my life, I really like this camouflage hat that Andrew said was too small for him. He has a big head. XD Anyway, it seemed to fit okay with me. I mean, it will never come off on accident, but I can still my head most of the time. It's nice, as long as Joe recovers from stabbing himself, we'll be completely unidentifiable. I'm even going to wear a pair of his glasses with the lenses taken out. NO ONE will be able to tell us apart! Flashlight tag, here we come... But yeah, earlier made comment about stabbing himself, we learned not to cut towards yourself with a knife. And that military people don't play around when they sew on their patches. THEY WILL NEVER COME OFF. NEVER. And that first aid kits actually are useful. And gauze pads. I think that's it for now, I have to look for a hammer. Bye!

The makings of chaos

Eck. I hate confusion. Let's see, I have to write up some "presentation", find something to use for a poster-like thing, do everyday work, get ready for the father-son outing, who knows what all else, and on top of that, I'll never have time to read my book. Oh well, wonderful stories are crushed and thrown away everyday.

Ward split is gonna happen. Matter o' time, mom, only a matter of time.

Well, seeing as it vaporises whatever goes within a few feet of it, we're a bit hesitant to touch it. We have some guys in hazard suits checking it out.

I see how it is. Mom loves the blog mechanics and doesn't love me. Oh well, I'm used to it. VERY used to it. *sighs and walks off*

Posted by Jake Renolds at 8:07 AM 0 comments













PSYCH! I love you, mom. *scurries off*

Bio in a nutshell

Okay... Not really really the explanation I was looking for, but better than '10-15 min presentation'. Yeah, this'll be fun. Anywho, as always I will not stay long, (are we surprised?) but I might be able to scrape up something new in my life...

Um, well, in church, we finally have enough Aaronic(sp?) Priesthood holders to bless and pass the sacrament without asking for people to fill in. We know what this means, right? It's only a matter of time before they divide the ward. It's always a sign that when you have enough people to pass the sacrament on their own, you have too many people. I think. Still, it's nice. We kind of had a musical chairs thing going on this time with some people coming late so people who volunteered to help had to get up, squeeze passed everyone else and everybody starts shifting around while people get organized. That and, Logan stole my spot. I've been doing that section for months. Alright, I am never getting there after him again. Easier said than done... And he did offer to give it back. Whatever, I don't care. Maybe I could use some change from what I shall call routine. It is not routine of course, but I use the word as a explanation. Maybe 'tradition' would be better for it.

Okay, the time is come, my head is empty, and all of you are asleep. So farewell and watch your step on the way out. There's been some chemical spill on the third floor.

AA Day!

Yesh, AA day, Friday, a beacon of hope that signals the start of the weekend. Freedom! I mean, uh. I'll really miss doing all this wonderful schoolwork. It is truly the thing that keeps me going throughout the day. What would I do without it? I'd be free! But yeah, we got little assignments today. Make a 10-15 min presentation on a assigned prophet. Mine is Wilford Woodruff. And it's required that we have a poster. So yeah, I'll be working on that a bit this week. Church website here I come! I wonder how you make slide shows... I dunno, anyway, there's a new person coming to seminary. Yay! More people! They're from Sutter Ward and their name is *drum roll* Jasmine. So yeah. Hurry! Our little group is getting bigger. Um, that might be it. It might be more than usual. I should call it quits, shouldn't I? I do have some work to do. Yeah, I'll do that. Bye everybody, or onebody, depending on how many people still bother with this.

Lair?

What secret lair? The attic? Whatever, this, just to let you know, will be short. Very short. I'm running late. I didn't even reply to my emails yet. *le gasp* Don't you feel special? Yeah, sure. La la la la la. Nothing to write, good. It'll save time to stop here. Don't expect so much next time, it'll leave you disappointed. Oh well, that's enough, I'm late. Good bye, everybody!

Secrets

I have to hurry. They'll have found out by now. I have to publish it and change all my passwords before they can get to it and destroy it. It's all been there... The odd symbol I kept drawing, the pen name Jake Renolds, the subconscious ideas like naming the blog the asylum, my odd ability to read people to a scary efficiency. Everything has been from there. The split personalities. Some personalities have been in other places. The Asylum, the bunker, this place, what I can only guess is real life. And yet all of them are connected somehow. They think differently, yet not so much as to cause conflicts. Jake Renolds, fellow escape partner, both managed to get out of the Asylum, but they've found out. We're being tracked... Jake Renolds, head of operations at the bunker. Engineer in the base site. It's all coming back... It's been in front of me the whole time. I've known, but I never realized it. The testing rooms below the Asylum. I have to get out of here. This might be enough if I end up being found. I'll have to return and make sure it's secure. If the personalities can communicate though, we might be able to evade them long enough to figure out how to stop it. There's not much time. I have to go. Things may change while I'm gone, but I should return tomorrow.

Creative genius or asylum excape artist?

I wonder. Well, not really, but I must pretend I wonder or else I'll give myself away. But you must understand, moms don't always have to lie about children's work. Honesty! Yesh, it is good. The blog is garbage and rubbish which people print up only for the pleasure of ripping them up. The fuel of the fires and the tenants of the landfills. Yep, that's what their fate is.

Now, do I feel like writing any more for the landfill pyro maniacs, or should I call it quits? That's right, ladies and gentlemen. I'm calling it quits! As always, the end is nigh and swift like a gust of wind over the ground. Toodles!